I previously posted this letter in another article, but because the handwriting is difficult to read, I decided to make a typed version for clarity. In the letter, Luke Wenke confesses to trolling the now-defunct Salamanca Topix forum and to more recent harassment, including harassing numerous victims from disposable phone numbers.
In my opinion, he seems proud of himself and remorseless aside from feeling sorry he got caught, but the reason I’m sharing it is so you can decide for yourself. And while Luke Wenke admits to doing things that he had historically denied, he blames Covid and substance abuse for his actions rather than truly owning his wrongdoings (again, just my opinion).
The letter is really long, and the pages seem out-of-order, so I re-ordered them in the way that makes the most sense to me. I did not have time to type them all up today, so I’ll post the remainder of the letter in future installments. For those who prefer to avoid the painstaking process of reading the letter word-for-word, I highlighted key parts.
USA v. Luke Wenke – 1:22-cr-00035
Document #139 – Filed July 23rd, 2024
Click to zoom.
“Before Jan. 28, 2022…
Luke Wenke does not know a single thing about criminal court or how jail and prison works.
2024…
Luke Wenke knows all kinds of legal nooks and crannies such as the possibility of a person getting arrested, being placed in any county jail, and immediately being put in a private room like the one I am currently in as of July 13th, 2024 even though you could be falsely accused of a crime and falsely accused of breaking a jail rule.
Making food off of commissary in the sink while singing “Ten Fucking Years In A Stupid Fucking Room” to the similar tune both Paul Kenyon and Katie [last name] absolutely remember singing ‘Thloppy Twat, Thloppy Thloppy Twat Yeah’ is not a sign of mental illness. It is a sign that my mind thinks of better things to do with everyone I know during better times.
Paul Kenyon will testify for the 2015 dinner theatre/cancer benefit I did at Good Times of Olean which made Katie jealous as I gave all of the money to [beneficiary] who Paul still lives with. Carl Paladino donated to [beneficiary], too.”
“I am not talking about my case. I am talking about any case. I am aware a person can legally get arrested and sit in jail for up to 10 years unsentenced with no court progress.
This very basic legal fact crossed my mind July, 2024. Imagine living for 10 years like this.
A Shea’s Theatre show about the mindless philosophical ramblings an inmate would speak out loud to themselves while living in a room like this day after day.
The suggestion is so simple I shouldn’t have to draw cartoons to spoonfeed the idea to court professionals who typically deal with scumbags like the Tops Supermarket Shooter. I am simply suggesting a positive project. Dedicate the show’s proceeds to a clearly needed Buffalo federal halfway house’s down payment/renovations and put it into Katie’s name in the Sinatra courtroom.
Luke Wenke:
Trying desperately to make good with everyone.
Danny Masterson:
Hyde from That 70s show who was an asshole, raped two women, and got 30 years.
‘Covid upended the hierarchy.’
-Alexander Anzalone to Luke Wenke [illegible] 2022″
“Federal Halfway House Fundraiser @ Shea’s Theatre (Among Other Agenda Items)…
I learned at the Allenwood re-entry class that there is a shortage of federal halfway houses. There is plenty of ‘digital footprint’ evidence of the local theatre shows I have directed in the past. You people reading this absolutely have the bravado to book Shea’s Theatre stage so we can do a show about how you could legally do up to 10 years in the Orleans County Jail private room I’m in as I draw this picture unsentenced being falsely accused of a crime and falsely accused of breaking the jail rules. Please ask Katie to sing the song ‘Thloppy Twat’ she and I used to sing together pre-Covid. That rhythm is basically what we will use when we sing ‘Ten Fucking Years In A Stupid Fucking Room’ on the Shea’s Theatre stage about my experience in the room I’m currently in but if it were for ten fucking years. All ticket money for the show goes to Katie [illegible].
[Thought Bubble 1] ‘I finally got [illegible] my MBA!’
[Thought Bubble 2] ‘Look at all of the more exciting things we could be doing in court!’
[Thought Bubble 3] ‘Wow! I agree! The hell with 2.5 year old email fight convictions!’
[Thought Bubble 4] ‘Kith me.’
[Thought Bubble 5] ‘I was 56 years old when [name] was 15 years old. Luke did a dinner theatre/cancer benefit for [name] in 2015 and gave all the money to [name]. That made Katie very jealous.’”
“People Key:
Luke Wenke’s father Kevin [last name] who has an MBA from University of Tennessee and named Luke after Luke Skywalker.
The permanently former Cattaraugus County Libertarian Chairman Luke Wenke who still hasn’t tuned Katie’s piano who would also prefer to apply 2.5 years of newly gained knowledge accordingly.
Judge John L. Sinatra who is so done dealing with people’s Covid era bullshit.
Katie [last name] who has a key to Luke Wenke’s house as we speak and likely has seen his Allenwood drawings of himself on his office desk and is forging Luke Wenke’s drawing style drawing pictures of Luke street entertaining in Vegas Feb. 2021 since she has [illegible].
Luke Wenke’s maternal first cousin twice removed Paul Kenyon who absolutely had an internet fling with Katie in 2015. Paul used to drive Carl Paladino’s nephew around for exclusive pay. [Illegible] Haunted Hinsdale.”
“1. Judge John L. Sinatra’s courtroom
2. Today’s witness: Luke Wenke
[Speech Bubble] ‘This is why this happened to me…’
3. [illegible]…obnoxious groups of Facebook such as Olean War Zone, once known as Olean Politics, where people slandered each other all day like a gossip forum and I even encouraged people to make fake profiles to fight with each other discreetly. March 2019 we had a few weeks [illegible] work at Domino’s so I was drunk on Smirnoff at home laughing at all the people in the comment section in a WIVB article as they senselessly bitched about Andrew Cuomo every time he made the news. So I made a new group for all the #FUAC daily commentary all 716 people are familiar [illegible] ‘Let’s Bitch About Cuomo’ had well over 10,000 members in a [illegible].”
“4. Even in the early 2010s, I would read people’s drama with each other on Facebook and I would repeat it all on a now defunct website called Topix. My high school mind watched the Jerry Springer show telling myself I wanted a show like that. As each adult year passed, the peak of it all went from Topix, to Olean Politics, to Let’s Bitch About Cuomo, to me livestreaming the George Floyd protests from my former Facebook profile which was shut down because of the livestream.
5. So in the end, during Covid Omicron when everyone reached a breaking point and therefore making everyone show their true colors, this ‘pattern of activity’, a criminal court phrase I absolutely remember absorbing and giving thought when I heard David Rudroff [former prosecutor] say it in 2022 in court, all boiled down to me making a fake burner number and taunting a bunch of people I knew for years who I found annoying during Covid Omicron. I texted Barry Broughton of AKT Combatives of Olean a bunch of taunts due to my Covid Omicron grief over one of his teachers Charlie Love, I taunted my Aunt Sarah McCaul over my deceased grandfather Dale McCaul’s house and their refusal to use it, I taunted someone named Jason Knapp over that fake burner number because I was exhausted giving him rides still at that point in his life.”
“6. It just happened to be someone I never even met face to face named [cyberstalking victim] who was clearly destined to be the one to crack down on the digital defamition of character violations I treated as my personal Jerry Springer entertainment for so long, as I absolutely remember sitting in Olean McDonalds January 2022 making all those Google profiles giving up [illegible] private firm, and I remember standing outside in my [address] neighborhood around midnight looking at all the households with Covid era fighting we [illegible] couldn’t do anything about with agitation while I taunted [cyberstalking victim] [illegible] iPhone [illegible].”
The Self-Pity Continues…
“7. I was absolutely not about to drive out to Minneapolis right there right then. I was also extremely non-sober as I sent that email. Since at that point I was complaining about the Olean Police not being able to do anything about the neighborhood I was calling 911 on as one of them broke down my front door Oct. 2021, maybe that’s what I got for going to an anti-police riot in a city I’m not even from. Doesn’t take an expert to see that the Libertarian party is not the best ‘people treatment’ club nor is it accomplished enough to lead it’s followers into proper knowledge on how to really ues all the levels of government to one’s advantage. The fact that it’s followers dedicated Covid crisis [illegible].
8. I remember Jay Bouchard of mid-Pennsylvania being perceived by my Olean Politics group as someone willing to drive right up to Olean and shake the community. Yes I see how average people of Minneapolis including [cyberstalking victim] would, even a year later, be extremely hesitant to deal with anyone from out of the area after what native Minneapolis residents went through in 2020. It’s like I wound up being Sherman Klump’s grandmother in the 1998 Nutty Professor movie as she held onto the lamp post getting blown in the wind, I got caught up in the very chaos I created on the internet for years. It’s not like I met Benjamin* [last name] at a beach party [illegible].”
*Benjamin is Ryan (Luke Wenke’s romantic obsession).
For someone who SWEARS he’s not racist, Luke Wenke uses a lot of derogatory language.
“9. But hey! While [illegible] changing things up and dialing it up a notch and drawing pictures of ourselves right to the fucking court openly asking questions over recorded phone lines and in writing such as ‘what kind of drugs do Vilardo and Arcara’s* relatives deal out there that got Waleed Abughanem‘s lawyer’s office ‘shut down’, let’s just say that in no way shape or form is it a form of unspecified bipolar disorder that I now plan on illustrating the defense to my case since I finished up the prosecution on the first side of this page.”
*Vilardo and Arcara are federal judges. Wenke has repeatedly claimed that the extended relatives of several judges, including the one overseeing his case, are involved in drug trafficking and other crimes.
10. [illegible] drove out to Minneapolis to meet the guy my FBI Discovery proves was behind that fake Recon profile asking if Benjamin [last name] does in fact have a fetish for boots and rope so he could re-enact it with his wife. Had I known Katie [last name] worked professionally from a laptop at home for that guy* I absolutely would have been more than happy to drive her to that city so she could meet her Cashapp-paying employer at the Red Lobster I went to. Covid had annihilated my prior social life so this would have been a positive thing to do. People who don’t have significant others listed out on their Wikipedia page understand the Covid social life annihilation that took place. As I learned at Horizons, we have mental health rights that can be violated when people like [non-white fellow inmate] the cottonpicking [n-word] p—-m—-y spade spits on us [illegible] in jail. Face to face [illegible] interactions are mental health rights.”
*I do not (and never did) work for Luke Wenke’s cyberstalking victim. My employment is none of his fucking business, but this is just another one of his pathetic delusions.
Stay tuned for the rest of the comic, which addresses Wenke’s alleged snitching to federal law enforcement.
